Is there an award for petty assholes? Because I think I have a winner.

So, today my Chair says, “have you got a minute,” which we all know is never good news, but I SWARE my conscience is clear.

So, I chase him down and he’s all like “There’s a complaint about your midterm,” and my mind immediately goes to the Groomer, but I haven’t even marked the midterms yet, so you know, what kind of complaint could she have? So I give this a moment to play out, and he asks if I can explain the circumstances of how the midterm unfolded.

My Chair is generally a good guy and all, but he has this habit of assuming that you know what he is talking about, which in this case I have no fucking clue, so I am just describing what happened, which is as follows:

The class is 50 minutes long and meets at 9, and so it’s a bit hard to have a full-on srs midterm, but by starting early because the room is empty and maybe squeezing a couple more minutes in at the end, in the changeover gap between classes, I tell them they can likely get a reasonable length essay written. So he says “yes, this seems to have been the problem”, which, you will agree, in no way explains what the fuck the problem is.

So, I say, I told them they could come in early, and about 80% of them were indeed in the room when I got there at 8:45, so we got underway, and the rest trickled in. So far so good. Then, at 9:50, there were a few students left and I told them to finish up, and I went outside and apologized to the person I thought was the teacher and said “They are just finishing up their midterm.” And this person said “Oh, no problem”.

Apparently, though, “Oh, no problem” is code for “This is such a problem that Ima report you to MY chair, who will then have YOUR chair say that there is a request for you to be reprimanded for disadvantaging students who needed to sit a midterm and also you have to write a formal apology”.

And I am all like “Dude, I am happy to apologize, because I thought I already did, but isn’t this a bit much of a rigamarole over 5 minutes, which 5 minutes was part of the 10 minutes changeover, and not in any way 5 minutes of this person’s actual class time?” And he says “Are you sure it was only 5 minutes?” And I said “Yes, because I was on time to my class that started at 10am”.

And then he’s like flipping through some papers on his desk saying “I need to get the details of this a bit clearer then”. And I am dismissed, still mystified, but now with one burning question –


2 thoughts on “Is there an award for petty assholes? Because I think I have a winner.

  1. fillyjonk

    Seriously. That person needs to remove their wadded undergarments from whatever crack they are wedged in.

    I’ve done similar things – starting as early as I can, running until **1** minute before the next class is due to start. The only complaints I’ve got? From the pwecious snowfwakes who can’t get their butt into a classroom at 8 am for an 8 am class, and therefore were “cheated” out of the 10-15 minutes that they were late.


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